eviction notice

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Over a dozens posts ago I proclaimed that I would cease writing about Benedict Cumberbatch. That worked not at all.

I wish I could just turn it off, thinking of him. Wanting him. I try. It’s getting better, a bit.

It’s not like I’m all alone and pining for some attention. I’m getting some. Mmhm. And I really like these men, especially my favorite one, but the other one is my favorite too, in his own way.  Despite his own opting out.

Honestly I want all 3.

Not all at once! Well, that’s not true, I’d love that. But, duh. Never in a million years will I get a menage a trios + mois.

But all 3 are so complimentary. But it appears that creating a man harem is really hard.

But I really am making the effort to evict Benedick Don’tComeBack from my thoughts. My heart. My blog.

I’m not in love with him. It’s lust. And a connection that is still in the curiosity phase due to his long ass arms in the long arm’s length stance. Maybe he is a total dick. I don’t know. I don’t think so. But all my friends do.

I’d love to find out. If we can be friends I’m up for it. Down for it. Whatever sounds the least sexual and most platonic.

If celibacy does not work out I would love to help you break that fast. Yum. But this push/pull/revolving door shit is over. I’m over it. Dude has no idea how many times I wanted to say “Fuck off” but my body just melts at the thought of him. Melts on fire.

But you’re  outta here. If you want to reconnect call me. Like the old person you are. You know how a phone works. But text is fine, I guess. But I miss that voice.

But yeah, anyway, byeeeee.

I am cautiously but definitely into Ed Norton.  And despite his shy/aloof/stand-offish vibe  I know way more about him in a few weeks than I do about Lord fucking Voldemort in 15 weeks. And when I’m with Ed I don’t think about Benadick.  At all. I did get shocked by some texts once but I didn’t wish I was not at Ed’s fabulous house having a fucking fabulous time with him. Not one bit.

Ed’s out of town on Mr Boss man man business. Andy has opted platonic. So now I’m sexless for almost a week! The horror!  Honestly, I need the sleep, and my bruises will heal. My sore neck will calm down. I’ll recharge with hermit time. But I am missing him. And not just for sex. I want to hang out. Talk. Laugh. He’s fucking hilarious. And clever. I even like his dog commands. I am not quite counting the days, but yeah, I am. A little.

I am not going to feed that fire of lust for that opting out BenJerkingMeAround ComeOnDude. I will just wait and see if we can be friends. If someday we could be lovers/sex partners/fwb. Without this bullshit. But for now goodbye.

I’ve got a new ringtone I wait for now.


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